Wednesday, July 15, 2009

my main man hp

might be replaced by cormac mclaggen. . . that finger licking thing he did? dear god. on point.

i have to admit i was disappointed in hp. the preview looked incredible and the midnight hype was there- there were 20-something of us in costume, yelling and clapping before the movie and generally freaking people out. we counted down and everything. but once the actual movie started there were so many WHAT THE FUCK moments when we would just turn to each other, mouths open, shaking our heads. so many things were just wrong.

i understand that the movies aren't going to be exactly like the books. there are obviously things that just wouldn't translate from page to screen. and i'm usually pretty good at viewing the two as separate entities. but maybe because i just finished re-reading the sixth book or maybe because it was so horribly done, every little thing was bothering me.

first let's talk the actual film part- beautiful shots. glorious. the lighting during the dead dumbledore scenes? heavenly. the sets were intricate and perfect. totally loving it. but the scenes were so short! nothing ever built up to the right level- it was like we were seeing some crazy condensed version. it was just bam bam bam. here. there. here. over there. back here. nuts. too much.

so many little arbitrary things were changed- like luna saving harry on the train instead of tonks. and dumbledore not paralyzing harry when malfoy confronts him in the tower. and then snape talking to harry before killing dumbledore- what was that? that didn't even make sense. harry has a temper and kind of has that whole 'always-wants-to-be-the-hero-thing'- if dumbledore didn't temporarily paralyze him, he totally would have done something.

then there was the romance thing. too much emphasis was placed on it. what's with harry and hermione's friggin heart to hearts? and the whole ginny thing was TOOOOTTTALLLLLYYY off. her feeding him tarts? offering to 'tie his shoe' (we all know where that was going. . .)? kissing him in the fucking room of requirement? where the shit is all of this coming from!

and then there was the whole random ass corn field battle in the middle of the movie! and the burrow catches on fire?!?!? where the hell did that come from? was my copy of the book missing a chapter? and what the hell did that add to the movie? NOTHING! terribbbllleeeeeee.

and they added the whole slughorn hourglass thing and that stupid story about the lily/fish. and the whole, 'harry has a date with a muggle' thing at the beginning. and the 'bellatrix lestrange destroying hogwarts shit' scenw. i'm not a huge fan of the additions, buti generally let it go. whatever. do what you want. but when they leave out vitally important shit in favor of adding more silly or pointless scenes? WHAT THE FUCK. i hulk out over that stuff.

for example: where was the whole back story on tom riddle? there was so much left out of that. including the fact that the horcruxes were going to be like 'trophies' or have some significance to tom. in the movie, dumbledore says 'they can be any ordinary object' which is the TOTAL opposite of what he says in the book, when he projects that the horcruxes will most likely be things that are symbolic and of great value to voldemort. and where was rufus scrimengeour? and the back story on fenrir? and the whole tension thing between lupin and tonks (out of nowhere they were just a couple! wtf!)? what the hell happened to the final battle scene? where was the obsession and paranoia harry felt towards malfoy, which was a huge part of the book? and where was the bond between harry and dumbledore? i have to be honest in saying that the actor playing dumbledore is not my favorite. dumbledore is supposed to be whimsical, somewhat other wordly- whenever i read about him, i feel like he knows more than everyone else, like he can see a much bigger picture. there's supposed to be a twinkle in his eye! this dumbledore just always seems cryptic and grumpy! the relationship between dumbledore and harry is central to this book- dumbledore is harry's last real parental figure and losing him is a huge blow and really sets him up for the whole independence theme throughout the final book. but none of the bond or even the sadness of losing dumbledore was conveyed properly in the movie. i wasn't even that sad when he died on screen- i bawled when i read about it though. and i think that was a major fault of the whole film- i wasn't into it. nothing drew me in. the harry potter series has the power to suck you into a whole other world. when i read those books, i totally forget about everything else- i'm so invested in the characters and the story. but this movie did nothing for me. i wasn't captivated at all.

i have really high standards for these films, and rightfully so i think. harry potter is just a whole other realm of fandom. you feel like you know these characters. and for them to go and royally screw up something on this kind of level was just painful. i was seriously disappointed.

at the end of the movie, the rest of the theatre clapped and my group of friends just sat in silence. we sat for about a minute, just blankly staring before the raging began. we raged about that movie all the way out of the theater, all the way to matt's house, and then for two hours at the house before we passed out around 5:30.

on a happier note: i did enjoy the scene with harry on the luck potion. it was like watching drunk harry. i think felix felicis is really just a shot of strong whiskey. i also enjoyed ron under the spell of the love potion. there were some genuinely funny parts in the movie. and the food matt made for the after party was banging. the after party in general was banging. and my friends are banging. there is nothing like having heated harry potter discussions in full costume while the sun comes up.it's absolutely glorious.

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