reflections on life in the foggy city

i've officially been here for a week now. a whole friggin' week. it simultaneously feels like it's been much longer and like i just got here. i didn't give a whole lot of thought to what it means to be studying in a foreign city- i just kind of it had it on my list. that sounds really terrible, but I wasn't expecting much of a culture shock. I just wanted a change of scenery and a chance to explore a different city. and they speak english, right? it can't be that different. yet it feels very very different. two of my classes (travel writing and innovation in uk media) require us to be very self-reflective and really analyze our place as foreign students. we're putting ourselves in the position of being an outsider, and though we move beyond the dreaded title of tourist because we're attempting to understand the culture better and staying longer, we still don't have the ability to assimilate fully. though london is a strange place to experience this- the city itself is so international. you constantly hear different languages and see different nationalities represented in the tube or the pub and even talking to people you realize how many arent' native londoners. and yet, i still feel very alienated in this incredibly diverse city. i feel like my american accent immediately draws negative attention. and somehow, i feel dumber when I talk to people. I know it's general practice among the college-age liberal crowd to hate on america, but i've never really had that mindset. I'm proud of where I'm from and i'm not going to trash talk my country. at the same time, i'm very aware of how we're viewed globally and i feel the need to downplay my 'american-ness' as much as possible for fear of feeding into even the smallest of stereotypes. it's very strange to try and live in an entirely new country. visiting, that's pretty easy, but living is a whole other game. again, i've only been here a week and hopefully once I start my internship it will be easier to meet British people and become more immersed in london life outside of FIE and my american flatmates. but as of now it's a very strange feeling. i'm going to try to think more about what i'm doing here and through what lenses i'm experiencing things. and ya'll might even get to read about my mental ramblings on this thing! waaahooo!

in fun news:
- keiran and i went to high tea with two other girls in our flat. the tube was on a 24 hour strike so we had to take the bus and traffic was INSANE. we were sitting completely still on the bus, crawling about an inch a minute (if that) and after an hour and a half, some guy on the bus got so fed-up he pushed the emergency exit button and just hopped off the bus. most of us followed suit. walking was so much faster. we each got our own little pot of tea and an adoorrrrable tray of pastries. i'm talking scones with clotted cream and jam, cupcakes, brownies, blondies, meringues, raspberry marshmallows- the works. we were totally stuffed. keir and i stayed quite a while chatting about feminism and sippin' our tea. then we left and went to the sir john soane museum.This guy was an architect and designed his house to hold his massive collections of junk. Mostly roman and greek stuff but also tons of art and random little knick knacks. He would let people come and tour his house and use the architecture artifacts as teaching tools for london architecture students. when he gave tours late at night, he would use oil lamps (like thousands of them) to illuminate the basement. so, every first tuesday of the month, the museum hosts candlelight tours of the museum. people literally line up down the block to get in and check this place out. it was verrrry cool.
- i bought some banana bread beer. smells skunky, but the aftertaste is legit banana bread. strange.
- SAW A FOX. not like an attractive man. like a legit, lives in a hole, fox. on the streets. just smelling some trash. keiran tried to chase it. it was so surreal. took a lot of pictures.
-played the worst game of pool ever. none of us know how to play and it was supremely embarassing.
-we've also been going to pubs and bars, taking advantage of the lowered drinking age, and imma just throw this out there, but it's not all it's cracked up to be. first off, drinks are mad expensive. and that's not even counting the pound to dollar conversion. second, i'm not used to going to bars in america so i have no idea what proper bar etiquette is/ how to act. not that i'm acting a fool up in these places, but i just feel like a kid at a middle school dance. that level of awkward. my lack of know-how coupled with the fact that i'm on the younger end of the age spectrum and i'm distinctly a yankee, means i stick out like a sore thumb and feel like the town leper. hopefully, this gets better as time goes on.
- my classes are all super interesting. we're taking a lot of field trips and i feel like there will be lots of opportunities for discussion/reflection. also: british professors = best accents. distracting at times though.
- got some cheese samples at the grocery store yesterday and dear god, i am back on the cheese wagon 100%. i don't have the budget for it, but i would like nothing more than to just sit in the whole foods cheese room (because that exists here. and it is heaven.) and waste away my entire savings account. christine and i decided that's the one thing we'll splurge on in france- wine and cheese tastings.