my love/hate relationship with the beach

 

this post should more accurately be titled, 'my love/hate relationship with the sun'.

 things i love about the beach:
- the boardwalk
- skee ball on the boardwalk
- riding surreys (with or without a fringe on top. preferably with.)
 - eating cider donuts while racing other people on surreys
- drinking on the beach (shh! don't tell the law!)
- photobooths
 - salt water taffy
- wearing weird hats
- salt water hair
- reading books in the sand
- taking naps in the sand

 things i hate about the beach:

 - THE SUN AND THE HEINOUS SUNBURNS IT GIVES MY FRAGILE NEAR-ALBINO SKIN.

dear sweet baby jesus! it never stopppssssss. maybe when i'm 23 i will magically wake up and be able to go in the sun for five minutes sand sunscreen before turning the color of ronald mcdonald's hair.

i understand that we need the sun. helps plants grow blah blah. vitamin d blah blah. perhaps more accurately, i should say i hate the sunscreen application process. it takes a solid twenty minutes for me to grease up and it's exhausting. by the time i have all these stupid grease all rubbed in, i just want to take a nap. and inevitably, i will go to the beach and have to reapply, this time, rubbing it in over top of the sand that's clinging to my body.

and somehow, in some magic way, i still end up getting sunburnt.

 i hope i am reincarnated as a tan person. or that technology makes it possible for me to not loathe the sun.